Published On:Wednesday, 19 October 2016

Is Boycotting Chinese Goods a Sign of National Pride?

​South Asian Humor: Bhishma Kukreti

My friend Rahul Bhatti  the CEO of famous Indian brand Anoda  said, " There is only one way India can come out of this  mess of imbalance between Chine import and export to China."

"How is it possible?" curiously I asked, as we were chatting with tea in Anoda head quarter.

"Indians really should boycott Chinese brands and should opt only for Indian brands as Anoda, Videocon, and BPL. Every time, Indians buy Chinese brand, an Indian loses job" Bhatti said.

I said, "It is vicious circle. Indian brands are costlier than Chinese brand. Take example of TCL or Heir, both are cheaper than Onida, BPL and even cheaper than Videocon. Chinese brands selling more, so, they are cheaper."

Bhatti's private secretary came and said, "Sir! Plastic body supplier Miss Chai –un- Lee on phone"

Bhatti picked the receiver, "Hello Lee! Where is the supply of plastic bodies for my washing machine? Plastic bodies were supposed to reach Noida by three days back. If you can't supply in time I shall seek another supplier for washing machine plastic bodies. See that, I receive plastic body by tomorrow"

"You get plastic bodies for washing machines from China and not from Indian suppliers?" I asked.

Bhatti answered, "Indian suppliers! Dam bad suppliers! I get at half of the price from China what these Indian buggers supply me. Indian suppliers are unprofessional"

There was buzzer on his phone and he listened, said to me, "A call from Taiwan" and picked up phone, "Hello! Kim Ling! What is the hell? I ordered thirty five thousand fully assembled Microwave Oven to you and still I have to receive five thousand convection Microwave Ovens. You know Deepawali sales have already started and my dealers as Vijay Sales is on my head. He is eating my head. Please find out where is the vessel on the sea." He kept phone.

"Don't you assemble Microwave Oven in India?" I checked up.

He explained," If I assemble Microwave Oven in my factory I will have to beg from tomorrow. Nobody can assemble Microwave Oven in India and sell at today's price."

 The purchase manager entered into room.


Bhatti said, "Mr. Balani! Tell me good news first."

" Sir Good news is that hundred containers of fully assembled 32" LCD panels (televisions) , thirty LED panel containers will reach to dock today and balance fully assembles all types of panels are reaching tomorrow. All imported parts for refrigerators have already reached at factories." Balani offered details.

"Now, tell me bad news." Bhatti asked.

"Sir! We called fifty thousand fully assembled mixer grinders from China. Now, custom officials are saying that importing fully assembled mixer grinders is unlawful. The penalty is fifty lakhs."

"How much are they asking under the table for clearing without penalty?" Bhatti asked.

"Twelve lakhs rupees." Purchase manager answered.

"Give them fifteen lakhs and get consignment cleared immediately." Bhatti ordered.

Purchase manager went out and a smart boy entered.

Bhatti said, "Yes Mr. Advertising Manager! "

Advertising manger showed four art works and said, "First art work is 'tomorrow's technology today'; another art work is 'The way foreigners live '; third is 'Smart brand Smart customers' and last is 'Buy Indian, Be Indians' campaign.".

Bhatti cleared, "Forget technology. Today, time is for boycotting Chinese brands and buying Indian brands. Therefore, go for 'Buy Indian and Be Indians' campaign. Put this ad in all TV commercials, print media, social media and outdoor. Put sketch of Gandhi Ji and photos of Videshi Kapdo ki Holi by Gandhi Ji too"

After taking a pause, Bhatti said, "Connect me to Baba Ramdev Ji, if he agrees, we shall put his photo along with Gandhi Ji in 'Buy India, Be Indian' campaign."


Copyright@ Bhishma Kukreti, Mumbai, 2016

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