South Asian Humor: Bhishma Kukreti
Yesterday, I watched a TV channel broadcasting Jungle News and the anchor was shouting, "Now! We shall show you how a lion does crime against deer!" The bottom screen was showing 'Coming up… crime among fish world…crime among insect world …jungle crimes in Mahabharata ...
Indians can't imagine that there might be crimeless news and views. From the time the UPA 2 scam era started, health guide magazines started publishing special column as 'Health Guide for Prisoners' or 'Suggestions for being healthy in prisons' or 'Subrata Roy on Health for Prisoners'.
A couple of month back, a health guide brought a special issue 'Twenty practical tips for escaping from Jail to Hospitals'. There were advices from twenty world top doctors in the special issue. Each doctor advised a special technique for felling ill in the jail that jail officials have no option but to shift the prisoner to hospital. In their articles, doctors offered the case studies of ex UP Minister Amar Mani Tripathi, SP general secretary Amar Singh, music industry king Bhushan Kumar etc felling ill in jails and holidaying in hospitals.
The said magazine was hit not only in India, Pakistan but in African countries too. In India, all politicians, political workers and business men bought the magazine. Magazine owner is now, planning for buying a couple of leading national newspapers.
Watching the success story of above health magazines, other health magazines brought special issues as 'Yogic way of felling ill for escaping jail for hospitalization', '100% tested Homeopathy methods for felling ill in jail! and 'jel men beemar padne ke Dai-Nani ke nuske'.
Health guide industry inspired children literature industry too. Now, you will get books on footpath as 'Jel me Beerbal ke beemar pada ke chutkale ', Tenaliram kaise jel me beemar pade', Mulla Nasurudin Shah ke jel se Aspatal jane ke kisse' etc. A competitor of Chandamama a children magazine brought three special issues pertaining folk stories of prisoners felling ill for shifting to hospital.
An Over The Counter (OTC) drug company has already planned for manufacturing tablets only for political prisoners. The market news is that within an hour after taking the tablet the consumer will fell ill without side effects. It is heard that there is competition among firms of Kapil Sibbal, Manu Sanghvi and Ravi Shankar Prasad for becoming legal adviser of the above OTC Company.
Now, there are books on Tantra and Mantra teaching to criminals for felling ill and getting shifted to ICU from jail.
Industry experts state that 'Health Tips for Prisoners for Hospitalization' industry has bright future.
(Gist from Fake Health Journal)
Copyright@ Bhishma Kukreti, Mumbai, 2016